A Better Version of Me (The Destiny Clark Saga Book 2) Read online

  “Josh has enough anger issues all on his own. He doesn’t need any extra help from me.”

  I went inside and grabbed one of Aunt Bethany’s no-bake cookies. I sunk my teeth into one and savored the perfect blend of chocolate, oats, and peanut butter.

  I found Aspen in the front room next to my family’s grand piano, talking to my best friend, Will Green.

  “Green! What’s up? When did y’all get here?”

  “Hey, Robinson,” he said.

  “They just showed up,” Aspen said.

  Was it just me, or was her face glowing?

  It shouldn’t bug me because I knew Aspen was crazy about me. I didn’t want to be the possessive, jealous type, but every time I saw them together, something felt off.

  “What do you think about the Clarks getting cast?” Green asked. “It’ll give you more opportunities to dig up dirt on the Mormons.”

  I gritted my teeth.

  As I’d gotten to know Destiny as a real person instead of some freaky Mormon, I realized how hurt she would be if she found out about the plan. If she knew the truth of why I’d been so friendly to her, she would be crushed. Somewhere along the way, Destiny had stopped being the enemy. Even if I got the Mormons out of the school, Hannah would still be Destiny’s friend, and it would probably just make her see Mormons as the victims and us as the bad guys. But I hadn’t bothered to mention my change of heart to Green. And definitely not to Aspen.

  I glanced over at Green, my mind fighting to find an excuse to change the subject, but Mom appeared in the room, announcing that it was time for Dad to blow out the candles on his cake.

  I breathed a sigh of relief as we followed her to the kitchen.

  3

  Destiny

  The following Monday Mr. Byrd passed out bulging manila envelopes to each of us with our names written across them in black permanent marker. “Inside these packets, you will find information to help you with your solos.”

  Once Hannah and I had our folders, we walked out of the room together with Isaac and Aspen right behind us. “Isaac, I’m so excited that we get to sing together. This is going to be so beautiful!” Aspen gushed. They walked past us, and she clung to his arm like she owned him. I scowled as I stared after them.

  “Aww how cute, Destiny gets to sing to the entire school about how she really feels about Isaac,” Jessie Larsen said in a mocking voice.

  I gave Jessie a strange look, and Hannah rolled her eyes at her. What was she talking about? I didn’t see how my crush on Isaac had anything to do with the musical. Worry settled into my stomach. Although I’d meant to do some research on my character, I still hadn’t gotten around to it.

  I followed Hannah to the library. We both had study hall next. We picked a round table in the far corner of the room. Scrawled across the top of my envelope were the words: Destiny Clark—Éponine. I pulled out the information sheet on my character and the background of the musical. The lower my eyes went on the page, the further my stomach sank. Not only was Isaac paired with Aspen as the leading roles of Marius and Cosette, the couple in love, but my character hit way too close to home. Hoping the initial description of Éponine was incorrect and that she somehow ended up with Marius, I flipped ahead.

  Page after page, my songs were all about unrequited love. So that was what Jessie was talking about. One was a duet with Isaac, and we even had a trio with Aspen where they were declaring their love for each other. My job was to stand on the sidelines and sing about how much it hurt. From what I could gather, the entire purpose of Éponine was to sing about how much she loved Marius, and how he never noticed.

  I looked up from my paperwork. Hannah was absorbed in her own world. According to my paperwork, her part was pretty monumental. She was playing Cosette’s mom, Fantine. Her eyes poured over her sheet music with a look of bliss on her face.

  I waved my character information sheet in front of her. “Did you know all of this?”

  “Sure, haven’t you seen this musical?”

  “No.”

  “You’ve never seen Les Mis?” Her laugh was incredulous.

  “I recognize some of the songs, but I didn't know what they were about! I’m happy to be able to get some performing experience, but this is going too far. Do I need to be publicly humiliated? Thanks to Jessie and her big mouth, I’m going to look like a loser in front of the whole school.”

  Hannah’s eyes brightened. “Don’t worry about it. You have Preston as your fake boyfriend, remember?”

  “Only Isaac and a few people think Preston’s my boyfriend. It’s not like we can spread it around school either. If Michael finds out, he’ll tell Preston, and I can’t have that.”

  “Why not?”

  “Are you kidding me? I would seriously die if Preston ever found out about the fake boyfriend thing. If you hadn’t told Mr. Byrd you thought I’d have good chemistry onstage with Isaac, none of this would be happening!” A few weeks ago, I’d caught Hannah in Mr. Byrd’s office, telling him that she thought Isaac and I should be cast together in Les Mis.

  Her jaw slackened as if I’d slapped her across the face. “I’m sorry. I really am. I had no idea he’d cast you as Éponine. I thought he was going to put you in as Cosette.”

  “I’m going straight to his office right now to tell him I’m not doing this.” I stood up from the table.

  “Are you serious?”

  “I’m dead serious. I can’t do this.” I stalked from the room. As I approached the choir room, I noticed the hallway door to Mr. Byrd’s office was open. Voices drifted from inside the small room. It sounded like Mr. Byrd and the headmaster of Bethel, Dr. Robinson, with his unmistakable drawl. I almost turned away to come back later, but when I heard my brother Michael’s name, I flattened myself against the wall to listen.

  “No, I disagree,” Mr. Byrd said. “I know Michael doesn’t have the perfect voice for the part. Obviously, if I were going for pure talent, I would have cast Isaac in the role. The truth is, I believe his goodness compensates for anything he may be lacking vocally.”

  “Goodness? You do realize the boy is a Mormon, don’t you?” Dr. Robinson spat the word “Mormon” like it was poison in his mouth he wanted to get out. He might as well have spit it in my face because it stung like acid.

  Mr. Byrd laughed like he couldn’t believe he was even having such a ridiculous conversation. “Yes, of course I know he’s a Mormon. I don’t see why it should be an issue.”

  “This looks like a case of favoritism to me, and I won’t have it in my school. Michael may have smooth-talked himself into your favor, but it doesn’t mean he’s the best qualified for the part.”

  “I don’t like what you’re insinuating,” Mr. Byrd said. “I’ve tried to cast the characters to the student I believe represents them the most fully. Not just in appearance and voice, but based on who they are as a person, according to the impressions I’ve gotten from observing them in the halls, in class, or wherever I’ve seen them,” he explained. “With all due respect, Dr. Robinson, I think if you want this changed, you’ll have to take it up with the school board.”

  “The school board? They wouldn’t bother with a matter like this. I’m just saying the most talented student should be cast as the lead.”

  “You son’s role is nothing to be ashamed of.”

  “You know Isaac’s better qualified as Jean Valjean.” Dr. Robinson’s voice was angry and low.

  “Since I’ve cast Aspen as his love interest, I would imagine he’s happy with his role. Ask him yourself. If he tells you he’s upset, then we can talk about this further. Until then, I don’t see a point to this conversation.”

  “The point is, I know you favor the Mormons. I heard you put his sister in a major role, too. Honestly, I don’t even know why they’re at this school anymore. If it had been up to me, they would’ve left when they converted eight years ago. I know people say they were some of our best church members, and they tried for eight years to bring them back. But it’s time for
those people to face the facts. They aren’t coming back to us, and every year they stay here increases the harm they may do to our student body.”

  I couldn’t stand to listen to anymore. Rushing down the hall to the bathroom, I pushed open the door and locked myself inside a stall. I exhaled, releasing the tension I’d been holding while I was in the hallway.

  All we wanted was to live our religion in peace. After we’d converted to the Mormon church, we’d decided to stay at Bethel because we liked the strong morals that were taught.

  Tears slid down my cheeks. What had we done to deserve to be treated this way?

  Michael had football practice Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, which meant on those days I was stuck riding home in the Suburban with the kids. My head swarmed with little bits of emotions and snatches of conversations I had heard that day, and Elijah and Brianna’s inane chatter in the car was almost enough to make me crazy.

  After finishing my geometry homework, I finally had time to escape to my sanctuary. My family’s home stood on twenty acres of lush Tennessee forest at the foot of a small mountain. I left through the back door in the kitchen, passed through the pool area, and descended the brick steps that led to the back yard. I crossed the wide strip of lawn beyond the fence and took the trail that led deep into the woods. Michael and Preston had cut down trees and brush to clear the path last fall

  As I trudged over the decaying leaves from last winter, my mind returned to Dr. Robinson’s words in Mr. Byrd’s office. What had we ever done to deserve such an attack from him? Especially Michael. He was one of the friendliest guys at Bethel.

  It was Michael’s frequent acts of kindness that had earned him the many loyal friends he’d gathered from around the school. Anger burned in my chest. He was the last person to deserve such an attack. All because of his religion. It was one thing for people to pick on me for my religion, but when they started picking on Michael, I couldn’t handle it.

  As I reached a small clearing deep in the woods, I spotted my hammock spot. I released a breath of relief. This was my sanctuary.

  I studied the strong trunks of the trees that had stood sentinel by my side so many times before. They had been worthy companions last fall as I dealt with the loss of Jessie’s friendship. With a heart full of gratitude, I placed my hand on the fattest trunk, a gigantic oak tree. I stared up into the branches covered with leaves so thick they blocked the sky.

  Climbing into the hammock, I let my body sink into the center as my thoughts returned to my day. I had to pretend to be in love with Isaac in front of the entire school. At least I wouldn’t have to do much acting. And, what about my trio with Isaac and Aspen declaring their love? I couldn’t imagine the torture that song would bring.

  I would have to practice with them.

  Together.

  I rocked the hammock, kicking my feet against the dirt. All I had to do was stay out here for a half hour or so, and nature would be enough to put things into perspective for me. My problems usually seemed so insignificant when I was reminded of the magnificence of the world around me.

  A chilly wind blew through the leaves. I shivered and hugged myself. Why hadn’t I had thought to bring a jacket? Usually, my hammock was an escape to help me clear my head, but the cold wind howling through the trees was no comfort to me today. I rolled off the hammock and returned to the warmth of my home.

  After dinner, Olivia and I had to do the dishes. I felt like whining about it, but what was the point? It wasn’t like anyone listened to my complaints.

  “You knew about Éponine, didn’t you?” I said.

  “You didn’t know?” she asked.

  “No,” I huffed in annoyance. “I didn’t know.”

  “What?” she laughed in surprise. “You practiced all that time, and you still didn’t know the story of Les Mis?”

  “Don’t make fun of me. I was so focused on my audition songs that I didn’t put a lot of time into studying the musical itself. I didn’t think I’d actually get cast.”

  “Then why’d you bother auditioning?”

  “Because I wanted to prove to myself that I was brave enough to go through with it. I figured it would be a good experience.”

  “I guess that makes sense,” Olivia said.

  That night we played Monopoly for our family night, but I couldn’t get into the game. “Destiny, you’ve been quiet tonight,” Mom observed, handing me the dice for my turn.

  I rolled a five.

  “She’s just jealous she can’t play the part of the girl in love with Isaac,” Elijah announced.

  “What?” I sputtered, my hand froze midair as I reached to move my game piece.

  “Oh, come on, everyone knows you have the hots for Isaac,” Elijah answered.

  Dude! The kid was only eleven. He’d been spending too much time listening to Olivia. I wanted to shoot Olivia an angry glare for blabbing my secrets, but instead, I played it cool and said, “That’s ridiculous. I have a lot of respect for Isaac, but nothing more. He’s not even a Mormon.”

  Michael shook in silent laughter on his side of the table but stopped when I shook my head slightly at him. He knew too much. He’d caught me gawking at Isaac at the retreat. Anyway, with Olivia’s big mouth announcing my secrets, pretty much everyone knew about my feelings for Isaac. It didn’t matter how much I tried to bury my feelings or convince them that I didn’t like him. They wouldn’t believe me.

  The next day at school, Hannah rushed up to me. At first, I was excited to talk to her, but then I remembered our last conversation had ended with me storming off to the bathroom.

  “Hey,” I said apprehensively.

  “Did you do it?” she asked.

  “What?”

  “Did you tell Mr. Byrd you were dropping out of the show?”

  I sighed. “No. I didn’t get the chance.” I told her about the conversation I’d overheard between Dr. Robinson and Mr. Byrd and how much it had bothered me.

  “That is so messed up. I’m so sorry for what my uncle said. I hope you know I don’t feel that way, too.”

  “No, of course, I know.”

  “Well, now you definitely can’t drop out of the show.”

  “Why not?

  “Because that’s what Dr. Robinson wants you to do.”

  She was right. If I backed out of the musical, I’d just be giving Dr. Robinson exactly what he wanted. To purge the Mormons from the musical. And I couldn’t let that happen.

  “Right now he thinks Mormons are scum. Be the best Éponine you could ever be and prove him wrong. Show him that you’re worth keeping around. Because you are. You’re going to be amazing up there.”

  “You think so?” I asked.

  “Absolutely. You’re going to kill it.”

  I threw my arms around her in a tight hug. “Hannah, how do you know how to say the exact the right thing to help me feel better?”

  “Does this mean you’re going to keep the role?”

  I nodded against her shoulder.

  She pulled back and said, “I’m so glad! It’s going to be so much more fun with you there.”

  Her eye caught something in the hall, and she bit her bottom lip. I turned to see what she was looking at and spotted her neighbor Evan walking past. He caught us watching him and waved. Hannah let out a huge sigh once he was out of earshot. “He is seriously so hot.”

  “When are you guys ever going to get together?” I asked.

  “I have no idea, but I hope soon,” she breathed. When Evan was out of sight, she turned back to me.

  “Too bad you don’t get to sing a duet with him,” I said. “Maybe you guys should have been cast as Éponine and Marius.”

  “Nah, I’m happy with Fantine. I listened to the CD of my songs last night, and there’s no way I can touch that level of passion and talent. I cried the first time I heard it.” She sounded like she was on the verge of tears just thinking about it. It was true. I could imagine that Hannah, who seemed to have everything a girl could want, would ha
ve a hard time identifying with a lowly prostitute who had a sick child.

  That night I listened to my CD, and as the music penetrated my heart, I knew I was crazy for even thinking about giving up the role. I called Sister Poff to see if I could continue voice lessons with her, just to get ready for the musical. She was ecstatic that I had landed the role and I told her all about the audition and how I ended up almost botching the entire thing. We agreed to set up lessons for the next month. I hung up the phone feeling more motivated than ever. I was going to be the best Éponine possible. Excitement surged through my veins. I could do it.

  I felt it deep down.

  4

  Isaac

  Early Tuesday morning, I spread butter on my toasted wheat bread and filled an insulated cup with steaming coffee. Just as I was popping the lid on, Dad came in and lowered into a chair, placing his laptop on the table.

  “Have a good day,” Mom said, kissing him on the cheek. She was tall, thin, and meticulous about her appearance and the way she ran her household—when she was home. She worked long hours as a Realtor and wasn’t around much. Josh took after her with his gold-tinted, light brown hair but got his cocky smile from Dad. I got my dark hair and eyes from Dad but the meticulousness from Mom. Dad was strict about keeping the rules and the way he ran the school, but when it came to housekeeping, he failed miserably. He and Josh were the messy ones in the family.

  “See you later,” Dad said. After she’d left, Dad looked up from his laptop. “Isaac, I need to talk to you about something,”

  “Sure thing, Pops.” I grabbed my plate of toast and pulled out the chair next to him.

  “I spoke with Mr. Byrd about the favoritism he’s been showing to the Clarks with the casting of the musical.”

  I furrowed my brow. “What did you say to him?”

  “Just what I told you when you came to my office right after you got the part. I told him you were better qualified to be Jean Valjean.”